Some Bad News

kiwijaz

kiwijaz

New Member
Hi all I recieved some bad news yesterday my father was diagnoised with Bowel Cancer and it has already spread to his liver and lungs so i will be dealing with all of that so will prob be pretty quiet on here for a while. Im struggling a bit with the news and it makes it evern harder that I am up here in Brisbane and he is down in Tassie. So if you know anyone who is doing the Shave for a Cure please give and hopefully they will find a cure before it is to late for him. Im considering selling the Navara so i can get the money to pay for my wife and I to have IVF to give my father a grandchild before it is to late.
 
Ekki Adventurers

Ekki Adventurers

4x4 Earth Contributer
My sincere sympathy to you and your family. Recently gave for the Big Shave as one of the guys at work lost a mate to cancer last year.
 
S

SoulSeeker

New Member
logitech said:
Sorry to hear the bad news mate. I wish your old man the best of luck in getting better.
Click to expand...

Hey Kiwijaz, I went through the same thing with my Dad in 1995. I recommend you try to get down to Tassie and see him ASAP and as often as possible. Even if you don't know what to say, like me, just being there for him, he will know and appreciate and you will never regret spending that time. It will be hard for you and your Dad, family, but you will get through this, and oneday you will appreciate the time you spent together in the final days. God Bless!
 
BUSHNUT

BUSHNUT

Well-Known Member
Sorry to hear the news mate- not an easy time especially with the distance involved . That sounds very extensive . Been through with it twice in the last six years, both my parents are gone with cancer; mum went within 7 weeks of being diagnosed - her high threshold of pain worked against her in the end . The old man,my adopted father, went in about four weeks after being admitted, went last October almost 5 years to the day.

There will be times that you feel totally useless, I hope for your and his sake that it is quick and merciful, people that know you will mean well, accept their well intentioned sympathy and offers of help whilst it is happening .- the reality is that it will be a time when you will feel that you want to be alone , take time outs , go for half a days drive or something like that .

What Soulseeker says is exactly right - do everything you can to be there ! It will be important for you as well as him .

Take care, look after yourself,

Simmo
 
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baldman

baldman

Member
Sorry to hear the news, best of luck and hope the outcome is good for all.

Lost Dad about 6 years ago (same insipid disease) and we tried to give him his first grandaughter before the end.

He was just as happy to see another grandson.

As mentioned above make the effort to get down there and tell him all the things us men don't talk about.

I'm so glad I told my dad I loved him and he was my hero when I had the chance. He also said things to me that I was longing to hear.

It's a sad and wearing time.

But you can use the time to create memories that will stay with you and wont all be bad.

Good luck and God Bless
 
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Pure Yobbo

Pure Yobbo

Moderator
Thats not real good at all.

As other's have said take the time to visit and spend time with him. Keep your chin up and soldier on be strong and look after yourself and your family.

Warm Regards

The Yobbo's
 
Patriot

Patriot

Administrator
Hey Kiwijaz,

That is really tragic news. Our thoughts and sympathy are with you. News like that really sets you back in your tracks. One of our guys at work has his younger sister in hospital at the moment with ovarian cancer and she is only 22.

James + Tina
 
WILKAT

WILKAT

Member
kiwijaz said:
Hi all I recieved some bad news yesterday my father was diagnoised with Bowel Cancer and it has already spread to his liver and lungs so i will be dealing with all of that so will prob be pretty quiet on here for a while. Im struggling a bit with the news and it makes it evern harder that I am up here in Brisbane and he is down in Tassie. So if you know anyone who is doing the Shave for a Cure please give and hopefully they will find a cure before it is to late for him. Im considering selling the Navara so i can get the money to pay for my wife and I to have IVF to give my father a grandchild before it is to late.
Click to expand...

Sorry to hear about your Dad,
Its not good being so far away to help,but if you can you should go down to see him.
Hope all works out well for all of you.

PS/I wish i had more time with my mum who died at 49 by cancer (i was 26) way to young to go,& yes I have also donated to this cause.
God bless you all.
 
Grumpy

Grumpy

Moderator
Sorry to here the sad news, spend as much time with him either by phone or travel down, you will both get a lot from it, Lost my dad last year not to cancer but he had bowel cancer and lung cancer but ironically he died of a heart attack. Take time to think things through before you make any rash decisions, a couple I know jumped onto that program 2 years ago and are still waiting. Good luck with your decisions.
 
centaur

centaur

Member
Everyone is right, spend as much time there as possible, you wont regret it. It will do your fathers heart good to see you there. You dont have to say or do anything, just a loving presence, support and a shoulder to lean on will make the fight easier and not so lonely.

I lost my father in 1985, he was sick for years and in and out of hospital, so when he went in last time, I thought he would be back out. I carried on with life as normal, but he never left the hospital. I missed all that time with him and that has been a lifelong regret. I was not there for the end, and as 1st son, I should have been. Dont make the same mistakes I did. So much was left unsaid, no chance for a final goodbye and that time I cannot get back.

But be comforted in the knowledge your father knows of your love for him, and that will give him strength and the will to fight on. Family is ultra important at these times, use their strength as your own, and hopefully you all will prevail. The mind is a powerful thing, the strength gained from a loving embrace or a caring gesture can go a long way. He obviously does not have to fight alone, be there and face it together.

You have our thoughts and prayers.
 
J

jagara

New Member
I know how you're feeling, mate. Lost my wife to the big "C" 13 years ago. Still feel teary at times. I suggest to get down there as soon as possible and spend as much time as you can there. Chin up, there are better times ahead.
 
ChallengeLee

ChallengeLee

Moderator
So sorry to hear your sad news Jared, can't say much more than what has already been said in previous posts.
Family is important and all to often it is far too late to say and do all those things we should have done before they leave us...take the time, do what you have to do to spend time with your dad and the rest of your family, you know you won't regret it and will have lasting memories to keep you going in the harder days ahead.

I too lost my dad to cancer and cherish every last moment we shared together.

Our thoughts are with you, Mel and your family and if there is anything we can do to help don't hesitate to call on us.

Lisa and Damon
 
tankbloke

tankbloke

4x4 Earth Contributer
Sorry to hear that mate,Lost my dad the same way.
He was in NZ and I was in Melbourne,so I had the
same distance prob.My thoughts are with you.
 
bmurray2250

bmurray2250

4x4 Earth Contributer
Hi Jaz

Sorry about the bad news, I can fully understand the feels as I lost my father to cancer some years ago. Prays are with you and the family.
 
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